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   Mine is a tale of pain and sorrow,

    longing and heartache, and betrayal.

    But let me assure you– this, like

   any story worth telling, is all about

   a girl.

Oh, Wait. Silly me. That’s Spider-Man’s story. Mine is a little less realistic.

Well, friends, clients, well-wishers, steady bad-luckers and those of you the accidentally landed here in Lattaland, I’m pulling up the stakes and leavin’ Dodge for Baltimore. That is to say, once I find out what state Baltimore is in. I’ll just head north and no doubt I’ll find it eventually.

You know what, folks? I feel good. I feel really, really good. I’ve never done anything like this, and it’s my time. I lived on the mean streets of the ATL all my life, and it’s high time for change and an adventure.

Sure, it’s exciting, but it hasn’t been easy. I had to leave behind my home, my studio, my pets, my family, my friends, a woman that loved me and, well, basically everything I have ever known. Man, that’s hard, contrary to what anyone thinks.

However, I am not doing this to be alone. Heavens no. I met someone. I met a woman with a face that could launch a thousand ships, and raise a sail or two, if you know what I mean. Erin is just the type you’d shuck it all behind for and travel 600 miles to be with. I don’t think I have ever been surer of anything in my life.

If I may stop with the sap for a second, allow me to give a big fat middle finger salute to all you judgmental old maids, spinsters and shrews. Keep clucking, hens. I am still the cock of the walk. You know who you are.

So along, Atlanta! I shant forget you.

Chapter 2 begins here.

No wait.

Here. It begins here.